Being in my second pregnancy (30wks) with a 3yr old little girl along for the ride in this one, has brought a real awareness of balance into my daily life.
Yes I’m talking about the physical sense of balance – when I’m in a rush I will probably bump into something or my baby belly will ! When balancing food on a fork or biting a biscuit, inevitably some of that lands on the protruding belly which keeps me an extra foot away from the table compared to everyone else. Then there is the lack of visibility to ground level. As my daughter has come to learn, if she is standing somewhere below my sphere of vision, when I go to walk or suddenly change direction, she goes flying!
And finally, yes, when I drop my pen or coins – they stay where they land. It’s sometimes too much of an ordeal to get into a wide leg supported forward bend (yoga talk for ‘bend over’) to just pick up a pen.
However, that’s when my 3yr old ‘gofor’ comes in really handy! Bless her !
But I’m also talking about the emotional balancing act of pregnancy & I guess being a Mum already now for 3 yrs. Hormones surge & recede with a real mind of their own. I can’t control it. That’s the job of my pituitary gland in my brain. But I can become very involved in how I react to these fluctuating emotions. Feelings of helplessness, anxieties about my labour & birth, loss of ‘control’ of my life, plagued by insecurities about the future and sheer physical fatigue can have me crying, or pacing erratically around the kitchen. Yes I can do something about that. I can be a lot kinder to myself. I’m simply experiencing a common symptom of pregnancy that no GP or OB/GYN will ask you about when they are checking your blood pressure or weight – the letting go or loss of control that you thought you had.
The journey of pregnancy & birth is the most carnal or primal life event of all. Nature is in charge. It’s a process and it has its own way. The sooner I surrender to that & learn to flow with it the better. My baby has to do it. I will too.
Anyway, once the biscuits are nearby and the steaming cup of tea is brewing, I will be fine. I know I will.